Thursday, January 31, 2013

Sniff, sniff, giggle!

Complete surprise of the day: William loves the NoseFrida! Most of us have colds this week, which means trying to find the most soothing means to calm children who don't have time or interest in such silliness. Dealing with a drippy baby is never fun, but when William had RSV last year we were desperate to ease his sniffles and found the icky, but effective, NoseFrida. (Look it up!) Not surprisingly, he found it as appalling as we did ... until last night. I had misplaced the thing, but when Jamieson relocated it, he didn't run. Instead, he was curious. To my complete surprise, he now finds it to be the funniest thing ever. He loves it. Do you know how hard it is to clean the nose of a child who is laughing? Difficult, but entertaining!

Sunday, December 16, 2012

Some thoughts on the unthinkable

In 1999, I was a graduate student at Northern Illinois working toward certification as an English teacher. One April evening, the class I was taking did not did not have the usual discussion on curriculum and pedagogy. We talked instead on the tragic news of the day. Among other topics, our instructor asked us if the horrific shooting at Columbine High School affected our desire to become teachers. My answer was impulsive, but true. I wanted to teach more than ever. Honestly, I can't remember what my exact explanation was in the moment, but I know I that day moved me from looking at teaching as a job and into seeing it as a vocation. Unfortunately, it also made it very real that schools were not safe from the world's evils. A few years later, I stood in my own classroom flipping through the school's "incident manual" and thinking through ways that I could possibility protect students of my own in a similar, horrible situation. Then NIU itself suffered through a tragic shooting and the feeling was not just "How could this happen?" but also, "Why, here? Why so close to home?"

Friday's violence in Connecticut was not physically close to home, but the grief it brings is so physically real. Those children, those beautiful, sweet children, were the same age Erik and his friends. I think I heard the beginning of the news on the radio early in the day, but it didn't register in my mind what the announcers were saying. Thinking it was about the recent mall shooting in Colorado, I turned off the station quickly, as I usually do when any of my kids are in the car and news of violence is reported. Just before heading out to pick up Erik at the end of the school day, I checked my email. The public schools sent out a message recommending ways to address the situation in Connecticut with children. Confused, I checked the news. And then I started crying. I did not wait in the car line to pick up Erik. I parked and stood where his class lines up. I watched the faces of other moms and dads who were all visibly distracted and upset, but trying to keep their emotions out of view of the kids. I took Erik's hand as soon as I saw him and we all went home, where -- for once -- I ignored the clutter and I sat with my kids. There were not enough hugs, kisses or books to be read to satisfy me.

Almost every night, I end William's bedtime routine by singing the last verse of "Away in a Manger" If you've forgotten, it goes like this: "Be near me, Lord Jesus/ I ask thee to stay/ Close by me forever/ And love me, I pray./ Bless all the dear children/ in thy tender care/ And take us to heaven/ to live with thee there." Saturday night Anna was in the Preschool Christmas Worship service (with a cute little sheep hat, singing every word right in the center of the stage). This morning, Erik was in his Sunday School Christmas service (as a wise man, who sang almost every word, when he wasn't grinning at his friends, the shepherds). In both services, the kids and congregation sang "Away in a Manger." Both times, I first thought it was sweet that William  seemed to think we were all trying to sing him to sleep. By the second verse, though, I was crying. I was crying for the children and teachers who won't be celebrating Christmas, or any other holiday, with their families. And I was crying because I can't protect my children. I can do my very best to take care of them when they are sick, to make them fasten their seat belts, to teach them not to talk to strangers. Their school will lock the doors and use every safety procedure. It may not be enough.

The thought of letting any of the kids out of my sight is now terrifying. Erik and Jamieson went to the final event of his Lego club Saturday morning, a big open house and competition. When I got there and saw a police car parked by the entrance I felt relieved that someone there could keep all the kids safe. Then the squad car drove away and I wondered if the dads manning the entrances really knew what they were doing. Sunday morning during church, William got squirmy and I was about to take him to the nursery, but I just couldn't. I wanted to hold him and listen to Pastor try to assure us that God really is in control, not worry about who might be coming in to the building and walking down the hall. In the morning, every parent in America has to let their child go to school and trust that it will be okay. We will see them again. We will serve snacks and dinner, and do homework and argue over how much computer time is okay and read to them and tuck them in with a kiss. Please, God. Please bring home safely. Every last child.

I will take Erik to school. I will not drop him off in the car line. I will walk him to the classroom. I will give him a hug. I will exchange glances with other moms that say we will be praying for all of them all day. I will try to fill my day with business so I can stand the wait till he comes home. I will pray and pray and pray. I will pray God protects my child. I will pray God gives his teachers wisdom and courage. I will pray for the peace of the families grieving right now. I will pray that God gives me peace, too, because I  know that He loves all these children more than even moms and dads. I know they really belong to Him. I also know that He gave them to us to take care of. We love them. I love my children more than my very own life. And I do not want to give them up. Ever. Please, God, help us all.


Monday, December 3, 2012

Well done

As I was backing out of the driveway to take the kids to school, I observed that it was a wet and foggy morning. That, I said, was why I decided to exercise safely inside instead of running outside in the dark and fog.

"You made a good choice, Mom," said Erik.

Aw. Positive affirmation for moms.

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Why the election turned out right

Christian voters were handed a great blessing last night. That may be a surprising thing to hear coming from someone who was disappointed last night that "my guy" didn't win. Frankly, I woke up feeling very discouraged. Then, this morning, I read an email sent out from Helen Alvare of Women Speak for Themselves. Her point was that had the presidency gone to the Republicans, Christians may have found it too easy to rely on government to address important matters of social policy.  As the results stand, Conservative voters know that there is much work to be done and we -- individual Christians -- need to get busy.

We Christian types often toss around the Biblical paraphrase that we are to be "in the world but not of it." Yet, our daily lives don't reflect that we believe that truth. American Christians have it too easy. Sure, we know our neighbors may find it odd that we get out of bed early on a Sunday and write checks to that big building on the corner, but we don't live with the reality of daily persecution that Christians in other parts of the world experience. Yet. Despite what the vice president said in the debate a few weeks back, the healthcare mandate is truly attempting to take away religious liberty from people of faith. Those who define family in traditional terms are being made into pariahs by government policy, school "awareness" weeks, and, of course, nightly television programs. The heart of Christianity -- sharing the Gospel message -- is viewed as offensive by our culture, and so we enter the season of "Happy Holidays" rather than celebrating the love that is Baby Jesus.

So, Election Day 2012 was a blessing. It means the policies that brought us to this point have only just begun and it means life as an outspoken Christian will get harder. And that means put up or shut up time for people who claim to believe the Bible. Do you believe those rock-star preachers who proclaim that if you believe enough you'll have success in life or if your church follows just the right steps it, too, will have overflowing parking lots every Sunday? It's a lie, folks. If they put our savior on the cross with nails, how dare we think life will be easy for us? A presidential administration that makes Christians uncomfortable is a good thing. It means we will stop coasting on the fallacy that this is a "Christian nation" and start doing the things that each and every Christian ought to do. If our leaders are passing laws that make us cringe, we need to do better. None of us will ever get it right. There will always be more, so much more we could do. Yet, we need to try.  Instead of spending the next four years griping about the election that got away, do something.

That something, by the way, is love. Jesus, himself said: " Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you." Kill 'em with kindness. Supporting your favorite candidate is a grand thing, but so much better is shoveling snow for a neighbor or donating the same food to the food pantry that you feed your own family. Christians love to proclaim the evils of abortion, but do we celebrate family and help crisis pregnancy centers or do we look down our noses at the girl who got "caught" and make jokes about the big families who "haven't figured out how that happens yet." Be better. If a family with a mom and a dad and some kids is ideal, live like it is. Don't complain about your kids and roll your eyes about your spouse. Make it something worth aspiring to instead of just another bunch of people in the same house. I'm talking to myself here, too. Nothing changes until we all act like that Jesus guy actually matters.

The world is going to be messed up. All the time; every day. That's a given. In Heaven we can ask God why he put people in charge of running his creation and why he left us running the shop for so long. Until then, we can sit in the mire and talk about how it used to be better and it ought to be different or we can be better and do different. Remember all that talk of hope and change? Our hope is in Jesus, but our mission is to change hearts and lives for him now.





"Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you."  -- Jesus in Matthew 5: 44 

"I have given them your word, and the world has hated them because they are not of the world, just as I am not of the world. I do not ask that you take them out of the world, but that you keep them from the evil one. They are not of the world, just as I am not of the world. Sanctify them in the truth; your word is truth." -- Jesus in John 17: 14-17.

"Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect." -- Romans 12:2


Monday, November 5, 2012

Do You Hear What I Hear?

Mom: Erik, what do you want to be in the Sunday School Christmas program? Sheep? Cow? Donkey? Shepherd? Angel?
Erik: Ummm...
Anna: I think Erik should be a train engineer.


Well, that would have made an easier journey for Mary -- Nazareth to Bethlehem by train.

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Columbus Day Weekend Get Away


Okay, so we knew several days away from home with three small kids was probably going to be challenging. We knew it would probably be more fun to remember the trip, than to actually do it. Turns out we were totally right. On the way home from our travel adventure, I contemplated renaming my kids Tornado, Temper and Timebomb. (And they would probably name their parents Tired and/or Testy.) Oh, well. We did it. We survived. And in the pictures it looks like we really had fun! It's all about making memories, and that I think we accomplished. So here are some highlights...

First Stop: Sweet Stop

We started off on Friday with the intention to make the Jelly Belly Center near Kenosha our first stop to break up the drive to Milwaukee. A friend mentioned the train ride to me a few months ago since we have such a train fan in our house. It was such advertising, but we enjoyed it (as I mentioned here). I have to admit, I loved the chance to sample those nasty flavors you see on the Harry Potter Bertie Botts Beans boxes and Halloween packages. They cracked me up. I do have this advice to share, which should be obvious, do not under any circumstances allow your children to bring the chocolate beans into the car to eat during the drive! I'm still finding chocolate covered jelly beans in the back of the van and I don't know if a certain middle child's car seat will ever be the same. Like I said, should be obvious!

Some of the delightful flavors offered at the bulk bins.
The free-sample bar  had plenty available for taste testing!

On to Milwaukee ...

We went to Kopp's Frozen Custard for lunch because it was a favorite place of Jamieson in his Marquette days. To the kids' disappointment we did not have any dessert, what with having bellies full of Jelly Bellys and all, however, the burgers were more than adequate. Then it was time to check in. 

"Are we there yet?" is generally the question that drives driving parents nuts. For this parent, the grit-my-teeth question was "When do we get to the hotel?" We had planned to visit several sites to make our trip worth the effort. Honestly, we could have parked ourselves at a hotel seven minutes from our own front door and, as long as it had a pool, the kids would have been thrilled. I hate hotels. Even the nicest hotels make me feel claustrophobic, but the kids were beside themselves with the wonders of a unique room with all its hotel features, you know:  microwave, lights, multiple beds, and, William's favorite, tissue boxes at eye level in the bathroom. Really it's hard to know what William liked best because he was so busy getting into ALL of it. There is NOTHING relaxing about being in a hotel room with a toddler. Nothing is baby proofed and everything is a potential hazard. So all time is spent either telling big kids to stop bouncing on the beds or removing William from the threat of wiggling the full-length mirror, dresser drawers, outlets, curtains, closet doors, and escaping down really long hallways. Ever see those shirts for kids and pets that say, "I'm the reason we can't have nice things"? He needs one that says "I'm the reason we don't travel." And don't even think about asking about how we slept. Five people; one room. Even suite style, there's no making up for the fact that the world's most inflexible family really, really prefers our own beds. Oh well, we survived those sleepless early baby days and somehow we all survived the sleepless travel days. Just. 

The kids got their afternoon pool time in and they were happy. In both Milwaukee and Green Bay we chose hotels that had shallow toddler pools with small slides and water jets. They were no water parks, but good enough for my crew. Since I haven't seen fit to enroll the kids in year-round swimming lessons, their swimming skills are erratic at best. So it was nice to have more than just a oval-shaped, sorta deep hotel pool  for them to really enjoy and not just bob about in mom-mandated life vests. 

For dinner, everyone seemed unlikely to manage a sit-down dinner so Jamieson chose a drive-though fish fry place: Serb Hall. How very Milwaukee to have such a thing but it was amazing. The kids ate the peanut butter and fruit we picked up at a grocery store on the way back to the hotel -- more fry for us!

In the Desert Dome
Saturday morning, we basked it the glory of the hotel breakfast. Kids love Fruit Loops. Adults love the waffle bar. Mmm. 

Tropical Dome = camera fog
We then drove through Jamieson's old college  stomping grounds and then headed over to the Domes. The kids enjoy the Garfield Park Conservatory in Chicago, so we thought they might like three! Ever since the hail storm of a year ago took out much of the glass at Garfield Park, Erik has been very concerned about the progress of repair. At the Domes he immediately asked if a hailstorm would break their glass. I think the technology of greenhouse glass improved by the time these windows were installed. One of the brochures said they used mesh glass from Germany. Nice of him to be concerned, though! 

Sheboygan is more than a sausage!

For the next leg of our journey we headed toward Sheboygan for lunch and a visit to Bookworm Gardens. Kudos to my mom for the recommendation to visit Bookworm Gardens! When Jamieson and I were little we both visited a place in the Wisconsin Dells called Storybook Gardens. We used to think it would be neat to take our kids there someday. Unfortunately, it closed a few years ago, so no photo ops of multiple generations in the same place. Enter Bookworm Gardens. Also inspired by stories, but so, so much better. Instead of being just statues of storybook characters, this garden is filled with book inspired vignettes and activity areas. The kids knew many, many of the stories that inspired the various garden areas but even where they didn't they had fun just playing. It's the kind of place the kids love because no one is saying, "Don't touch." They are supposed to explore and they do. 

The entrance 


Bookworm Gardens: I totally want our new shed to look like this.

William having a moment of zen

Notice a theme? He did NOT want to relinquish that broom. 
The Three Little Pigs: feel free to make your own comments

For the record, I caught William before he fell out of this chair.
Getting a nice picture of these three bears is impossible!
Without hesitation, I would definitely stop at Bookworm Gardens again and I would wholeheartedly recommend it to families with kids, as well as adults who love gardens and/or books. It was a delight.

On to Green Bay...

We made it to Green Bay with enough time to squeeze in some pool time for the kids again before attempting bedtimes. Sheer exhaustion helped everyone sleep a bit better for the second night of the trip.

Our plan for Sunday was to enjoy another ample hotel breakfast and then make our way to the reason for our Green Bay destination: the National Railroad Museum. We needed to make one other stop, though. It's no surprise to anyone that we aren't the biggest football fans around, but if football needs watching, it needs to be the Packers. Jamieson feels more than a bit of loyalty to his Wisconsin roots and I find the Packers to be the only team I can stomach. The whole fan ownership thing is a win in my book. So, we swung by Lambeau. We had checked that there wouldn't be a game in town while we were there, since we did want to be able to afford a hotel room, but it seemed worth it to stop by. So, the kids ran around the atrium for awhile -- nice place! -- and then we marveled at all the Packer products in the gift shop. Packers paper towels, really? Alas, our attention to the team did not bring them a good score later in the day. Nevertheless, I enjoyed seeing the stadium, at least. I love how Green Bay is just a mid-sized town that anyone's cousin or grandma could live in and then all of a sudden, there's an NFL stadium down the street. Not sure where everyone parks for the big games, but it is a nice place.


The gift shop is that way!

The high point of the day was the train museum, of course. I've already written about it here, but it deserves a few more thoughts. The National Train Museum is a great place. It's not huge, but their collection of rolling stock is first rate. Someday I wouldn't mind going back to take in the truly historical aspects of the museum and its displays (when I can do so without loosing track of my peeps). Not unexpectedly, by the end of our visit, our tired train lover Erik was declaring that he didn't really like trains. We predicted that within a few minutes after leaving he would declare it his favorite place ever. Guess what? "I loved that place. This is a great vacation." So, I think it's time to adjust a parenting strategy just to see what will happen. Generally, I don't tell the kids about play dates, parties and trips till just before they happen. If things get changed or cancelled, the grief is much easier to manage if they never knew about the plans in the first place! On the other hand, it's more than time to begin learning to adjust to disappointment. Plus, maybe some advance notice will help take the edge off that overwhelmed feeling all three kids seem to get when they're doing something out of the ordinary. It will mean a lot more "No, it's not time for that yet." from me, but maybe moods will even out in the long run. Who knows.

An action shot of Anna at the railroad museum playground.
Honestly, action shots are about all we can get. 

Loving the cab inside the Big Boy

Oh, look. William is sticking his fingers in a random hole in a train car. Again. 

The boys on the ground while Anna and I climb to the top of the observation tower.
She made it to the very top, all 99 steps. That's my girl! 

View of Green Bay from the observation tower.
The clouds don't give it justice, but the fall color during the trip was spectacular.


To end our train-themed day, we had dinner Sunday Evening at the Titletown Brewing Company. Despite the name, it was more about railroads than Packers. Housed in an old depot, the historical building was a great place to end the trip. Or would have been if not for the 20 raucous middle-aged women having the time of their life in the table next to ours. The silver lining there was that William could be as loud as he wanted and no one cared. Anna had crayons and a kids' placemat to decorate, so she was happy. Jamieson and I liked the history of the place. So, the majority had a good time.
How I felt at the end of the trip.
(Actually, another cute statue at Bookworm Gardens.)

So, final thoughts. It was a good trip. It was a hard trip, but we expected that. I don't think we are going to plan any further excursions until William is more comfortable with alterations to his routine. Not that any of us do change very well, but he will be easier to tote along as he gets older, I hope. Every place we visited was fun and worth a repeat visit in future years. It's not all bad, though, to hear the kids say that it's good to be home. Maybe that's worth the effort of a trip, too. 

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

I'm Bored!

Dearest Children,

Believe it or not, "I'm bored. There's nothing to dooooooo," does not inspire me to turn on the TV for you. In fact, it tends to make me want to load up all your toys and drop them off at Goodwill. Also, "I'm going to my room!" isn't generally perceived as a bad thing by the adults of the house.

With love,
Mom